Clipping A Night Owl's Wings

 I have adrenal fatigue.

What does this mean? I means that my life as a person who stays up till 2:00 am working on homework is over for now (except on the rare occasion when I have a paper due and even then I usually only get to 1:00 before I'm dead). It means that unless I get at least 9 hours of sleep, I'm dead. It means I take lots of naps. It also means that there are times when I have to skip school or church or work because I just can't get out of bed .

But what is adrenal fatigue? I think I've written about it before, but here is a nice handy definition :

"Adrenal fatigue is a collection of signs and symptoms, known as a syndrome that results when the adrenal glands function below the necessary level. Most commonly associated with intense or prolonged stress, it can also arise during or after acute or chronic infections, especially respiratory infections such as influenza, bronchitis or pneumonia" (http://www.adrenalfatigue.org/what-is-adrenal-fatigue). 

Some time my senior year, I managed to over tax my adrenal glands and they decided to go on strike. So, now, they don't work properly. They don't give me energy like normal people's do. When they aren't working it's not just normal tiredness. Although, most of the time it isn't so bad, last summer I basically had no energy at all and I lay in bed most of the day watching youtube videos. I've gotten better since then and I am able to function normally most of the time, when I get a good nights sleep. But when it's at its worst it feels like I'm trapped in my body. It takes every strength of will to keep moving and not collapse. The only thing that have way keeps me functional is lots of caffeine. I went from drinking at most 24 oz of Pepsi a week and the occasional cup of coffee or tea to drinking one of the bottles every day I can't manage to get a couple hours nap, along with coffee and sometimes several cups of tea. Even then, I still feel tired.

Unfortunately, things like staying up to late, having lots of stress, waking up too early, taking part in lots of physical exertion, all deplete your adrenals. So basically, as a college student, I'm screwed. And because of this, here I sit, at 4:30 in the morning, unable to get to sleep for some unknown reason even though I am exhausted. I'm worried about how I am going to make it through tomorrow and the last few days of school when my body was barely functioning already and now I have gone almost an entire night without sleep. Wondering what I'm going to have to miss, or what homework I'm going to have to let slip through the cracks just so I can get enough sleep to be able to function.

So yup. That is my life right now. I've been struggling with trying to go to bed early when I am naturally disposed to staying up as late as possible, and trying to manage to work and go to school. It's been kinda hard. Especially when I've been so busy that I have to stay up late working on homework and studying for tests. But things are getting better. I just have to be careful about how much I do. Try not to over book myself. It can take up to two years to recover from adrenal fatigue if you get enough sleep, reduce your stress, take lost of vitamin C, drink salt water, and some other random things, but it does get better. I hope. I just have to be patient and trust God, because He knows what he's doing. Hopefully, it will get better soon.

~Nat

27 Room Keys

Well, it's actually only ten...But I thought that "10 Room Keys" wasn't as nice a sounding title. Plus there is that little tie in to the movie which gives a sense of recognizability and pulls people in. And I'm the writer so I can do what I want. So don't criticize me!

 Even if there aren't quite 27, these ten room keys are still impressive. You see, they each represent a hotel that I stayed at during my speech tournaments (by the way...I would appreciate if you didn't tell the hotel that I stole their keys...). Each one represents a different story in the journey that was my first year of college forensics. I will not be telling you all of their stories because that would take too long, I'm tired, and plus I don't exactly remember them all. Remember, I'm the writer. I can do what I want. But, I will tell you a general overview of my whole speech year, because that is much simpler.

Before I get into my story about this past year of speech, I'm sure you all want to know how nationals went. I didn't end up getting to out of prelim rounds in any of my speeches, but many of my teammates did and they did an amazing job! Because of the great job they did, and the points the rest of us got in prelims, UNO got 5th in the nation for the second year in a row. Which, considering our team is significantly smaller and has significantly less funding then any of the other teams that got in the top ten, is pretty amazing.

Now, back to my story.

I started out speech, not quite sure how things were going to work out. I loved speech in high school, but this was a whole new cup of tea. I had a lot to learn about how they did it in college and at first it was kind of hard. I had particular difficulty with the monster know as extemp. To those of you who don't know what that is and want to find out click on the smiley: :); to those of you who don't know and don't want to bother to find out, just know, it is very time consuming; to those of you who do know, you know what I'm talking about. It was very discouraging for me because it was so time consuming. I just didn't have the time to do as well at it as I wanted to and for a perfectionist who is upset that she's getting a B+ in history class (darn you history teacher! Why can't we have some more extra credit?), not being able do the best I could drove me nuts. Once I got more used to the activity, I found it easier to make better use of the time I had and it started to feel more comfortable. Now I like extemp; which is a good things since I am banned from ever quitting since apparently it shows a person is good when they get to finals at a state tournament in extemp as a freshman.

The story of extemp essentially applies to how the rest of my speech experience went: I wasn't comfortable, I found it hard and so I didn't enjoy it as much at first. As time when on though, I grew to love it and am now even more addicted to speech than I was in high school. I fell in love with it all over again and I am going to be sad when I have to leave it. Even more than that, I fell in love with my team. I knew from my first meeting when I was auditioning for the team that they were special and I felt for some reason that I belonged with them and I do. All of the people I have met are amazing and are some of the most special people in the world. I am so excited for more years to get to know them all.

And that is basically it with my story. I learned to love speech again and I found some amazing new friends. I'm really glad God brought me to UNO. I'm excited to see what next year brings. I'm sure it will include a lot more good stories and definitely many more hotel room keys.

And now I should probably get back to writing my English paper....

~Nat

No More Missed Calls?

I never had any desire to get a normal tattoo...I'm not quite sure I would ever want this:

Not the actual tattoo (no duh). 

"If you think we're already attached to our cell phones, you're wrong. Nokia has obtained a patent for a tattoo that vibrates when you receive a call or text." -Christian Science Monitor


And honestly, why would you want to always know when you get a call? It removes the best excuse for when you want to avoid responding to someone: "I didn't feel my phone." Although, it would stop my brother from getting all ticked at me for not responding to him when I put my phone in my purse and it's on vibrate.

Picture taken from: http://troglopundit.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/phone-tattoo.jpg

I'm Back!

As is very apparent, I took a very long unannounced break from my blog. First, school just got so crazy that I didn't really have time to keep up dating. Then, when I actually had time, I didn't feel like writing and I didn't want to burn myself out by forcing it. So, I just stayed silent for awhile. But now, the writer in me is waking up again. Maybe it's because winter is (hopefully ending) or maybe because last night was the first time in ages I have stayed up till 2:00 am (don't worry, I got up at noon yesterday, as well, so it's fine). Anyways, here is an update for you all:

School:
 Even though last semester was crazy for me (never take a 8:30 am class the morning after a night class that goes till 10:00 pm and speech practice that often goes till 9:00 pm), I had a lot of fun. So far, this semester isn't as fun. I love my debate class and English Lit is pretty fun. But World Civ and Human Geography are boooorrrring. The subject matter is kinda interesting, but there is really no intellectual stimulation involved. There aren't any papers in Geography and very few in History. All that's involved is listening to lectures and taking test. *sigh* I miss paper writing.

On the other hand, forensics is going very well. I think I am finally getting into the swing of things.

Personal:
I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!! Yes, I am very excited about this fact. Not so much because I have a boyfriend (honestly girls, they are often more trouble then they're worth), but because it means that I get to have the most amazing guy I have ever met be in love with me. Bryan has been one of my best friends for a long time and the fact that he can be more than that makes me very happy.


God:
I have discovered why so many college students fall away from God. It is very easy to push Him aside when life is busy. I've found myself kind of doing this. Especially because traveling to tournaments means missing church a lot of the time, it can be very easy to lose sight of Him. So, right now I am working on making time for him every day by doing devotions and stuff. So far, I have not always remembered, but I'm getting better, so that's good.

Thank you all for reading my blog and hopefully I will get back into updating on a more regular basis.

~Nat

Behind the Scenes

Have you ever wondered about a writers writing process? Well, here is a peak into what mine looks like.  This is a small selection from a paper I was writing for English.  It took me like an hour to write this much...

Appiah brings up some worries in connection with a *stops to think of words* persute pursuit of an individual life. *Takes a break to stir the taco meat* The first is that it could tend towards the arbitrary. *checks on the taco meat again* “Suppose, for example, I adopted a life as a solitary traveler around the world, fee of entanglements with family and community *doesn’t like this and erases it*  *changes “a pursuit” to “the pursuit”*  *goes back to the taco meat* To use his example, what is to stop a person from setting of to be *gets a text* *responds* a “Scholar Gypsy.” Some one Someone who merely flits from place to place “free of entanglements with family and *gets another text* *responds* *goes to check meat* *does dishes* *cuts up tomatoes* *starts eating tacos, sadly without sour cream* *gets chat message* community” and only making the money necessary to survive. *gets another chat message*  *gets a glass of milk* *eats more taco* *more chat* *stares at computer trying to think what to write next* This doesn’t make full use of the person’s tallents talents *pauses some more* *more chat* *and more taco* and is essentially a waste of their life. The second *pauses to think of word* charge against the *more chat* *tries to think of word* individuality is that it *more chat* is “unsociable.” (67) Because you place your views about your individuality *gets distracted by Katie’s TV show* a quest for individuality is based on your knowledge, opinion and will; there is the possibility that a person could become ingrown and only focus on themselves. 

So, what do you think?  Will this type of thing become as popular as movie behind the scenes? Yeah...I don't think so either So that you can actually makes sense of what I was writing; here is the finished section (I did do a few more revisions to it after the above was completed): 


Appiah draws attention to “a couple of worries” in connection with the pursuit of an individual life (66). The first concern is that it could tend towards the arbitrary. What is to stop a person from setting of to be a “Scholar Gypsy?”(67) Someone merely flits from place to place “free of entanglements with family and community” and only making the money necessary to survive (66). This doesn’t make full use of the person’s talents and wastes his life. The second charge against individuality is that it is “unsociable” (67).  A quest for individuality is based on an individual’s knowledge, opinion and will, there is the possibility that a person could become ingrown and only focus on himself.  


~Nat

Why Do We Take Vacations?

My brain is a contradiction.  I was blessed with a very logical and pragmatic portion as well as a completely flighty emotional one.  This leads to very interesting arguments inside of my brain.  One of the most common ones is the purpose of spending money on fleeting things such as concerts and vacations. My flighty emotional side loves the experience and doing new things; while my pragmatic part grumbles about wasting money on things that don't last. So why do we do this? I mean, I know we aren't Vulcans (if you don't know what those are you obviously didn't grow up with gigantic nerds for family members) but our actions should be governed by some logic, right?

My mom has a phrase that she always uses whenever we grumble about not liking a family outing. She says that we are, "making memories." Now, although she just applies it to situations that are less than desirable; she is kind hits the mark on this one. Isn't that why we-well everyone but my family pay big bucks to go on fancy vacations; to make memories?

 But even though there is a reason; the logical part of my brain still asks "what is the point of making memories?" For awhile, I didn't have an answer to that. But then, the other night, it hit me. Memories are what define us. They make us who we are. For example, when we lived overseas we used to have to take this horribly nasty malaria medicine. I mean it was bad. The worst thing that I have EVER tasted. To reward us for taking medicine like good little children; our parents would give us chocolate afterwards. I soon began to associate the taste of the horrid medicine with chocolate and it wasn't long until I began to dislike chocolate and refused to eat it. So, the bad memories I associated with the medicine erased my love of chocolate for awhile (don't worry; I have it back now).

But memories can have an even larger impact on us than just changing what foods we like. They can define out character and change our personality. A guy who has had a lot of betrayal or abandonment in their lives will be more closed off from people. A girl who was told everyday she was beautiful will be more confident and sure of herself. Our memories and experiences make us who we are. And this is the answer to the pragmatic bit of my brain; we spend money to make good memories because good memories make us better people. So go ahead, spend loads of money on your vacations! (Unless of course you want to send some of that money my way. I am a broke college student after all.)

~Nat

The First Week has Passed...

...and I think I love college.  No, seriously, it is so much fun. I have discovered that I like having a schedule when doing school, it keeps me from procrastinating too much. It is also fun being able to get out of the house a lot. It is a new and different environment to discover and I look forward to finding out more about it. The classes I am taking this year are English comp II, introduction to American government, introduction to criminal justice (yes I am a complete nerd and chose these classes because they sounded fun but they also count for my core which is awesome) and art . I am especially excited for my art class because I have never taken an art class and it will be nice to learn more technique for my drawing.

A few highlights:

1) Being required to buy art supplies.
2) Having extra grant money left over.
3) SPEECH! :D
4) Interesting professors.
5) An amazing clock tower on campus that plays music.
6) My classes being close to each other.


Some not so fun things:

1)Waking up at 7:00 am.
2) Having to go to be early because you are waking up at 7:00 am.
3) Lugging a two ton backpack around.
4) Knowing I will have to take tests.
5) Having a major ADD moment because I was sitting around all day (I was seriously super wired, it is not fun when you need to go to bed.)
6) Missing out on stuff because of my busy schedule.


~Nat

I Smell a Sequel

Remember that really silly movie awhile ago called Snakes on a Plane? I think I have found a sequel to it.

"Re-Post this Status": A Rant

I have seen a lot of this recently, and although almost all of the statuses (stati? *sigh* grammar) support good causes, I still find them incredibly annoying. These statuses try and guilt you into re-posting the status. They say things such as "if you are not afraid to show your faith" or "if you support our troops" then you should re-post this. Implying, that if you don't re-post it you are a horrible Christian and/or are a horrible person.

I don't think that it is right to guilt a person into showing support for a position. Just because you don't post a certain combination of words doesn't mean that you are afraid to stand up for your faith. Just because you refuse to be copy everyone else does not mean that you don't truly support our troops. Just because you refuse to spread a cliche phrase does not mean that you aren't a true Christian.

And because they chose to use status that tries to guilt me into re-posting it, I don't feel like doing it. I don't respond positively to negative pressure to do something, and when someones status pulls a guilt trip, my reaction is to ignore it.

Well, that was fun, but I should probably stop ranting now and bring this post to an actually beneficial conclusion. There are many people who respond negatively to the coercive language that the re-posted statuses used, but if a person where to phrase it more like "Please show your support and post"  instead of "this if you truly support this then you should re-post this," it would be more persuasive and a person would be more likely to do it.

So the conclusion is: our words have a powerful affect on people and if we want to be able to persuade a person to do something, we need to be careful how we phrase our wording.

Thank you.

The End

~Nat

The Dark of the Night Brings Depressing Thoughts

So, because of my ADD and the inability to control impulses and make wise decisions that is connected with that disorder, I did something really stupid. Especially for someone with adrenal fatigue (we have settled on this diagnosis for the time being to explain my tiredness) which requires a goodnight's sleep to get over. This is the stupid thing I did: stayed up late finishing a book, and now I can't sleep.

When I am lying in bed trying to sleep I let my mind go and wander where it likes. Tonight it wandered to a depressing place, to thoughts of goodbyes. It started contemplating people I hadn't seen for awhile and I realized that there is a very good chance I will never see them again; this makes me terribly sad. But life is like that isn't it? Our lives touch the lives of others for a time and then we part ways. It is a constant cycle of meetings friendships and goodbyes. Continually letting people into your hearts and lives, only to leave, never to make the connection with them again. Then there are the people you do see again after you have left, but you only see them for a short time and then you must say goodbye again.

 You can keep in touch through letters, phones, emails and facebook, but it is never the same as the real thing. Also, the number of people you touch in your life continues to grow, making maintaining contact with all of them incredibly difficult.

These thoughts are enough to make me almost wish I grew up in a small town where everyone I knew was born, lived and then died there. But that kind of place would be so incredibly dull that I think it would drive me nuts. Even so, I never want to be one of those families that moves a lot, I want to live in one place my whole life and I want my kids (if God blesses me with some) to grow up in one place.

But, even if I did stay in the same place, there are still going to be goodbyes. That is just the way of life. I know that all the Christians I have come in contact with I will see again in heaven. But that is a small comfort to me at this moment because I am pretty sure heaven won't be the same as it is on earth, so what I know and love now, I may never see again.

Didn't I say these thoughts are depressing? There are almost enough to make me want to avoid all attachments until I get to the place where we never have to say goodbye. But humans weren't meant to alone, no man is a island, and I would get waaaay too depressed without human contact.

So, I guess I'll just have to live with it and go to sleep.  It is the way it is and staying up mourning about all night is not beneficial. I hope I didn't depress you too much. Goodnight.

~Nat

Where Does It All Go?

I am missing some clothes! And not just a random sock or a shirt I never wear; I am missing important clothes that are staples in my wardrobe. My black tank top that I wear under everything, my favorite pair of shorts and my black flats, have all disappeared. I have looked in all the usual places: the dirty clothes, the clean clothes, under my bed, in all my drawers, and they are nowhere to be found. For a girl, this is a crisis! How on earth am I supposed to accessorize my outfit correctly if I don't have my black flats?! (And for those of you that don't know me well, this is sarcasm. I am not that crazy about clothing. But still, not being able to find my favorite shorts is kind of a bummer.) 


You know, this whole crisis reminds me of that one Arthur episode when DW has lost her sock (for those of you who don't know what Arthur is; watch this and be educated). It turns out that the sock was stolen by a neighbor's dog and taken to the "sock market" ,* a place where pets take their owner's socks and give them to other pets. The purpose is to help stimulate the economy because it forces them to buy new sock. 


So, I guess that must be it! My brother's guinea pig stole my clothes to help the economy! Excuse me while I go interrogate a rodent as to the whereabouts of my clothing...


-Nat 


P.S. For those of you who may be wondering after my last post, I am feeling a lot better now.  We think that it was just my adrenals being overtaxed because of all the late nights and the stress. So, now that I have been getting to bed earlier, (although I am not doing such a great job of that tonight) it has been a lot better. But we are still going to go on another elimination diet to see if that helps too. (For those of you who don't know what this is, let's just say that it is worse then having to watch the Hannah Montana movie every night from now until I graduate college.) 

*when you are quoting something and the punctuation wasn't in the original, are you supposed to put the comma before or after the quotation? I have seen it both ways and I have no idea. It seems to make more sense to me to put it after since it isn't part of what is being quoted, but I could be wrong. (Also, I am never quite sure what is the proper procedure for punctuation and parenthesis.)  

God Give Me Strength

I'm getting near the end of my rope. My body is completely out of whack and I don't know what is wrong with me. I thought it was just food allergies, but even though I have tried to cut all of the stuff that bothers me out of my diet I still don't feel better. And it turns out that it might actually be something other than food allergies. I don't care what is wrong with me,  I just want to know so I can fix it. But I don't know, and so I spend almost every day fighting to get stuff done when all I want to do is sleep. It is a constant struggle against a complete lack of energy, and I don't know how much longer I can do this. I know that God puts trials in our lives for a reason, and I will do my best not to give up. But I just pray that God will give me the strength to get through this because I can't do it on my own.

Oh, Darling, Don't You Ever Grow Up

It's happening, I'm growing up. I've signed up for classes next fall, met with the speech team and figured out my schedule without consulting with my mom. I guess I'm an actual adult now. This sucks.


Honestly, I don't think anything has terrified me more than all of the occurrences that have taken place since my graduation. Having to do and figure out stuff on my own, no longer having a parent or sibling with me for every new activity, knowing that this fall, I will be walking around campus, surrounded by complete strangers. Also, I have already started missing out on spending time with old friends because of my new life. So on top of the terror, I have this feeling of great sadness.

But even though it is scary and even though I don't like growing up, I also know that it is time to move on. I can't stay in high school forever. Even though the scared part of me would like to just stay where I am safe and comfortable, the rest of me is ready to move forward to a new and exciting adventure. It won't be the same and there will be a lot of new challenges to face, but I am ready (sort of). But regardless of where I go and what I end up doing, I will probably always still think of myself as a homeschooler.

Different from Our Expectations

At the regional speech and debate tournament in May the tournament director read a letter from a person who had judged at the tournament. In the letter the judge had written (among other things) that he had come to the tournament expecting a bunch of unruly teenagers, and been surprised by the professionalism and maturity that the competitors had.

Sometimes in life we expect one thing, wish for one thing or want one thing and God gives us something completely different. At the beginning of this year I wasn't expecting to go to nationals, and if I went to nationals I figured would probably go in debate because I hadn't a chance in speech. Well, whadya know, I made it to nationals. Three guesses what I qualified in. Yup, speech and my dramatic interp at that. Me, the girl who was not meant to do well in all types of speech, especially the interps. God sure has a sense of humor, and He is also very good.

But apart from just debate, there have been other areas in my life where I have expected or wanted a particular thing and God has surprised me with something else. Something that I have realized is better. One area of this is my college. This year I applied for two colleges, Hillsdale and the UNO. I really really wanted to go to Hillsdale. It was a good college, I knew I would be challenged there, I could get a good scholarship and I already knew a bunch of people going there. I didn't get in, I got into UNO instead. A college I only applied to after I found out I wasn't going to Hillsdale so that I wouldn't be stuck taking classes at a community college.

But looking at things now, I am very glad I'm not going to Hillsdale this year. Yes the school is good, but the classes are hard, and I don't know if I would have been ready for them. Yes there was a good scholarship, but I'm able to go to UNO pretty much for free and I won't have to take out any loans. Yes I have friends going there, but I now get to stay home with my family and friends here. I can still work with the debate club, judge tournaments and get used to taking college classes without having to go so far from home. I still want to try and transfer to Hillsdale after I finish this year at UNO and I really hope I get in. But I know if I don't, it will be for the best.

So yes, sometimes in life we get what we don't expect and because God is in control it is often better. The judge who wrote the letter had gone to the tournament expecting normal teenagers, and he was surprised for the better. He also wrote that he had gone simply expecting to judge a couple of rounds, but he came away with a conviction to go back to church and re-explore the Christianity he had abandoned. Sometimes what is better, is different from our expectations.

-Nat

Scientist Discover the “Narnia Effect”

By Natalie Schneider

May 6, 2011

Have you ever sat in class and felt like it lasted longer than the specified hour? Do you remember how when you go shopping time always seems to move faster outside of than inside? Well, according to a recent discovery made by scientist you might not be so off on how different the time seems to be.

Scientist discovered what they are dubbing as the “Narnia effect.” It appears that in certain areas, time is actually warped and activities that take place in that area actually move slower or faster than activities that take place outside of it. “It is actually quite spectacular,” Dr. Braden Harm, one of the scientists who discovered this, stated. “For some reason certain events and locations will attract this phenomenon, and time will actually become distorted.” The areas that attract this singularity that have been identified so far are shopping centers, class rooms and debate tournaments. This discovery is being touted by some as one of the greatest discoveries of all time. Dr. Steven Evens, another scientist working on the project, stated. “If we can harness this we can use it to put terminal patients in stasis until a cure can be discovered. Or even travel through time.”

Some people still remain skeptical concerning the validity of these findings. Dr. Jeckle Hyde Professor of Physics at the University of Maryland is a vocal critic of these findings, “The idea that time could be warped like that is just plain ridiculous. We all know that it is just our imagination,” Hyde stated. “We already know that time is relative,” Dr. Harm responded. “So this theory is not that big of a leap from that. Besides, all of our experiments support our findings.”

Regardless of the accuracy of these findings, this revelation has caused quite a stir around the world. Some people have become strongly critical of the project, claiming that it is dangerous if the wrong people acquired it. The Lead Center for Time Travel Discovery (LCTTD), the organization that discovered the phenomenon, has come under heavy fire from activist groups. Mary Little, leader of People Against Time Travel (PATT), organized a protest outside of LCTTD headquarters stating, “These actions are foolish and wrong, we should not be allowing them to try and gain power of time. This will lead to the destruction of our world as we know it.” They have also received criticism from the Vulcan Science Directorate who has already “determined that time travel is impossible.”

The controversy that has surrounding LCTTD has led to some private donors removing their support from the organization. But despite all of the trouble Frank Furrter, spokesman for LCTTD stated that they will, “stand firm behind their discovery” and not “simply push it aside because there is some opposition. All of the great scientific discoveries met with opposition  and if those people gave up too, we would still think the earth rested on the back of a turtle.” 

Easter

Last night I was reading through the story of Jesus' death and resurrection in the gospel of Matthew, and for some reason the story really hit me hard. Maybe it was because I was tired and especially emotional. Or maybe because I have been trying to imagine what it would actually have been like to be the people in the Bible as a read it. But whatever the reason was, I was crying my eyes out as a read the story of Jesus' death, and as I read it, something struck me. Jesus did all this stuff for us. He came down from paradise, suffered so much pain and felt God turn His back on Him, for us. He did all this even then we are no where close to deserving it. Yet, my life, I am not willing to do the simplest things for Him.

I hardly spend any time reading my Bible because I am too busy doing other stuff. I don't want to speak out for Jesus because  I am afraid of being ridiculed. I don't want to witness to people because it is uncomfortable for me. I don't put others over myself, like He asks me, because then  I don't get to do what I want. He went through all that pain to save me, and I am not willing to give up a little of my comfort for Him. He loved me so much, and I chose to ignore Him because I am too busy watching Youtube videos.

So, on this Easter, God has really convicted me. I need to strive to do more for Him. Not to pay Him back, not to try and get even. But because He loves me and  I love Him back.

-Nat

Updates on Tournaments and Such

I haven't posted in awhile, obviously. So I figured it would be a good idea to let you all know that I am, in fact, still alive and that I have not been abducted by aliens or been subject other such occurrence that would prevent me from posting. Nope. Hey, have you ever noticed that half of the time when you read blogs the post contain long apologies about why they haven't posted in awhile because they've been busy? Well, I suppose traditions are supposed be followed so...I'm sorry I haven't posted in awhile, I've been super busy.

So here is an update on what is happening with pretty much the most important thing in my life right now, debate:

At the qualifying tournament in Lincoln got 11th in debate, 1st in dramatic, 7th in impromptu and semifinalist in apologetics. I also received an honorable mention for the spirit award. I'll take a moment here to explain what the spirit award is to those who don't know. The spirit award is an given to one male and one female competitor who exhibit the fruit of the spirit, the person gets nominated for this award and then the leadership decide based off of those nominations who should get the award.

Although I credit God with all of the awards I have won, this one more than all the others is because of God's amazing grace. You see, even if it were possible for a person to achieve anything without God, I would not have gotten this award. This is because I am not not bent toward the actions that got me nominated. The nominations talked about how I was talking to and encourage others, how I would go up to people in the halls and ask how they are doing, and how I had a positive attitude even if things didn't go my way. But that is not me, at least not without God. Naturally I am a very selfish person, I don't like to think of others first, I am also rather reserved and don't like putting my self out there with people, and I hate not succeeding.

But getting this award made me realize the amazing changes God has made in me. Although I am still very selfish, I can see myself putting others first. Because of God I am growing in this area. Even though I still am kind of shy, God has helped me gain a great deal of confidence in myself through acceptance of the completely weird person I am and trusting in Him instead of worry what others think of me. Finally, God has helped to be able to let go of success. I no longer look to that as a goal, or feel like a failure when I don't achieve it. Because of God's working in me instead of success I focus on having fun, learning a lot, growing as a person and bringing glory to Him. God is so completely amazing and I look forward to seeing the other changes He has in store for me.

Moving on now to the qualifying tournament in Minnesota. There I got semifinalist in impromptu, 4th in dramatic, 3rd in Team Policy (TP), 2nd TP speaker and 1st in persuasive. I love sequential awards. ^_^

 And even here I can see God working in me. This speaker award was the first speaker award  I have gotten all year, and because I hadn't been doing as well in speaker points I decided to really work hard at improving my speaking, and it payed off. Also, it was so amazing to get first in persuasive that I had written a couple of weeks before the tournament, memorized the week before, and not expected to break in.

Also, debate people are just the most awesome people on the planet, so I have been having so much fun at these tournaments! I will be so sad to not see them all next year.

So yeah, debate has been pretty awesome and God has been even more awesome. Now I should probably go do something like prepare for the regional debate tournament.

-Nat

P.S. I said I would post more pictures from our MI trip, so here they are:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/1northstars/sets/72157626562239286/show/

Also, I am doing this thing where I take a picture every day. So here is a link to what  I have done so far:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/1northstars/sets/72157626563037446/show/

Iran Claims Bazookas Would Only Be Used For Peaceful Purposes

March 10, 2011

By Natalie Schneider

Wikileaks has become infamous for releasing information that governments would rather not have see the light of day. Wikileaks recently turned their attention to Iran and a under the table agreement between Tehran and Moscow. The website reported that Iran had allegedly entered into and arms deal with Russia, in which they agreed to pay $1.53 million for 9,000 anti-tank weapons, 5,400 AK-47s and 2,500 assorted hand guns.

Iranian President Mahmud Amadimjad tried to quit the fears of the West by explaining that “there is currently now deal in the works” but if there were a deal they “would only be using the weapons for peaceful purposes. When pressed as to list any peaceful applications for the weapons, Amadimijad replied, “We could use the bazookas for shooting water balloons” and the other weapons could be “modified and used for paintball. We are really bored in Iran and it would be cheaper for us to modify these old guns than to buy new paint ball guns. Those things are expensive.” Russian official seemed to back up Iran’s story, denying the existence of any deal. They also stated that the weapons mentioned were “too old” to be used in battle anyway. But that they would be really effective at shooting paintballs.  

Despite the assurances of Russia and Iran, not every country is accepting their word in regards to this deal. Isreali Prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu expressed doubt as to the trustworthiness of Iran, “they have gone behind the backs of the international community before, so we have no reason to trust them now.”

On the opposite side of the coin is the US and President Obama, who expressed his trust in the word of Russia and Iran in a press conference on Wednesday. Obama said, “I am sure that everything is completely legal and above board with Russia and Iran. I trust Russia, after all we have reset our relations with them and we are now the best of friends.”

Some analysts in the US are not as eager to trust Iran as our president is. Dr.  Scotch Taipe PhD Senior fellow at the Center for Middle East Occurrences is inclined to distrust the word of Iran. He stated that, “Iran has repeatedly called for the destruction of Israel and the West; they have lied in the past in regards to their nuclear capabilities. We have no reason to believe that they are telling the truth now.” Dr. Taipe also added that their whole story about using bazookas to launch water balloons was, “ludicrous.”  


Note: Just to ensure everything is clear, this article is completely fictitious.  No research was done for any of this. 

My Week in Song (A Little Late): On the Road Again -Alvin and Chipmunks

On Tuesday we got back from a 12 hour long road trip to Michigan. We went up there for my Grandpa's 80th birthday. Although it was so amazing to see all those family members that I hadn't seen for so long. I have had enough of road trips. Between that and debate tournaments. I will be happy when I no longer have sit in the car for longer than 30. Well this is all I'm going to post today. I have another tournament to prepare for. But in the meantime. You can enjoy some of the pics I took, and when I finished editing all of them I'll try and put the entire album online.

My Week in Song: How He Loves US -David Crowder Band

(Lyrics at the bottom)

I am exhausted. So exhausted I can't remember how to spell exhausted (thank goodness for spell check on Google Chrome). I got back from a debate tournament at 1:00 Saturday night or Sunday morning, depending on how you look at it. Now, you may be wondering why I am still tired when that was several days ago. If you are wondering that, you have obviously never been to a debate tournament. But even though I am super tired, I am so glad I went to that tournament, because I had an amazing time. It is always so much fun to debate, meet new people, dress up in suits. I am going to miss it so much when I graduate.

Now you may be wondering what the heck the song I posted has to do with a debate tournament (my goodness you wonder a lot of things). Well, at that debate tournament I was reminded of how much God loves us, and how much he cares about even the small things. My partner and I broke in  debate for the second time,

getting 6th place and something happened that I never thought would happen. I got first place in something. Dramatic interpretation to be specific. I never even imagined that I would get first place doing and IE. You see, I never thought of myself very highly as a speaker. For the first four years of my debate career I never qualified in speech. I never even really got close. Then last year I was able to do fairly well in a couple of my 

speeches. But I never imagined I would get to the point where I would be good enough to get first.  

God has blessed me so much. Without Him I would not have found that amazing speech to interpret and without Him I would not have the skill to speak like I did. I am just so amazed that He cares about us and loves us so much that He even helps with the small

 things that are unimportant in the grand scheme of things. But I am also amazed by how He also loves us enough to not give us what we want all the time. You see, I also competed in duo interpretation and impromptu. I didn't qualify in those, and I'm glad. This keeps me humble and pushes me to work on those and improve. So yes, He does love us so much and I am so glad I am aware of just how great
that love is.

P. S. Yes, I know it is silly to stay up till 1:30 when I am exhausted. But I have an aversion to going to bed at a reasonable hour.

Lyrics

Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us oh
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He is jealous for me, Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realize just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.

And oh, how He loves us oh,
Oh how He loves us,
How He loves us all

He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.

And we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If His grace is an ocean, we're all sinking.
And heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don't have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…

That He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.

Yeah, He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.

_________
Lyrics courtesy of: http://www.onlylyrics.com/hits.php?grid=11&id=1034792